This resonates with you. Probably. Contrary popular belief, many people are not willing to “lawyer up,” or fight in court over who gets what and where their children live. They would rather let the divorce lawyer or judge decide. If you and your spouse have been together for many years, what happens to the property that has accumulated? How would you feel if your spouse decided to put off their career to be with the family? Now, you’re trying to determine how to fairly divide marital property, split your time equally with minor children, and calculate how much alimony one spouse will pay to the other.
The mediator will be a third-party neutral person who is trained to resolve disputes. They can either sit with you two (or between you two, in separate places, if you prefer) and help you work out your problems. Who wins the house. Who is the primary custodian of your children? You can peacefully settle divorce disputes about your kids, animals, property or money.
Together, you and your mediator can find answers to the toughest questions. Mediation is most likely to work if you both are prepared to compromise and do the necessary effort. Although you won’t be able to get all you desire, you will get some. It’s cheaper and better to let a court decide on your behalf.
You probably have done research on how much divorce costs. Also, you’ve heard about how stressful divorce can be. It’s a fact: Nobody wants to expose their dirty laundry publicly in court. What if your spouse is not on board?
Try to establish some ground rules between you two for your divorce. Are you two able to agree on the fact that the courts will be used only as a very last resort in the divorce process? Can you both agree that the court will only be used as a last resort? If you establish ground rules, you’ll be more able for each partner to deal with divorce overload.
Mediation can feel like a slog. You can’t be protected from the emotions that arise when ending a relationship (marital or otherwise). You’ll be able to keep an eye on the goal: a solution that is both win-win and will set you up for a new chapter. The 10-point check-list contains the TOP tips that have been learned in the 16+ year history of mediating separations. You’ll find practical tips that you can implement from the pre-divorce stage to the post-divorce phase.
The divorce mediation process is a form of alternative dispute resolution. It allows the divorcing couple to reach a mutually agreeable agreement by using a mediator who will act as a neutral third party. A mediator has no authority to decide. The mediator acts in an impartial capacity, and tries to reach agreement regarding any financial disputes or issues relating to co-parenting.
The mediator helps both parties understand their priorities and the issues that are involved in divorce. He will also clear up misconceptions. And he may even offer some ideas on how to reach a settlement. You should be aware that a mediator DOES NOT REPRESENT either party. The mediator’s primary objective is to facilitate agreements, and not to represent you.